My head is full of thoughts and direction and yet I am overwhelmed and unsure of my next step. Where am I going? What was I doing? Focus and then confusion, this is my current routine.
Thoughts and plans spin rapidly in my brain. Formulas and ideas for my next class or venture spring up. Plans and possibilities are everywhere. One minute I am excited and the very next I am unsure. I can feel my confidence slide and slowly slip between my fingers. I find myself sitting…starring blankly at the screen wondering not only where but how do I even begin. Looking at the clock I find that what felt like moments were really minutes. Minutes that slipped into hours. Hours of sitting, with nothing to show. A blank screen. A reflection of the direction I feel like I am heading.
I am torn with do-ing and be-ing. Knowing full well that I am still in the state of be-ing. The do-ing is coming…
I realize I cannot start do-ing right now, even though I have this intense need to surge ahead at times. What I am realizing is… if I started do-ing right now (that is if the universe actually allowed me to, which it is not!) I would end up re-doing everything anyway. It being stressed to me in so many ways that everything is not in place yet, ideas are still formulating. The intentions are still fermenting, getting ready to burst through the soil. The Cycle of time right now is that of a dust storm. Those things that have not quite been dealt with or taken care of are being re-circulated to the forefront of our attention.
The next two weeks are going to be about waiting out the dust storm. Letting the dust settle before we start sweeping up the debris. If we start now we will just be moving it from one corner to another. Give it all time to settle, then asses what is still needing cleaned up. THEN, finally we can start the steps needed to create the space for all that we have been dreaming of. This winter has been about seeding our intentions for the coming year.
Mercury being in retrograde is usually a challenge of its own, but right now it actually feels helpful. I communication that is struggling for most of us in our internal communication. The clarity and then the haze that we may feel internally actually forces us to look deeper within. It is as though the fog we may be experiencing is the universes way of slowing us down from being to reactive. Basically what I am trying to tell you all is to realize you are not alone… right now, just take some breaths, trust all will make sense soon, and go with the flow.
Spring will be abundant. Abundant in so many ways.
Enjoy your Monday!